Truths About Law School

by seaaarch

After graduation from law school, you are going to be a lawyer.

At some point, someone started a rumor that a law degree is flexible. Someone told you that you could go to law school and then do something non-legal with it, something interesting, even something fun. You cannot. When you graduate from law school, you become a lawyer. And being a lawyer is rarely fun.

Being a lawyer probably does not entail the day-to-day tasks that you think.

Before going to law school, you should know what lawyers do during their days. Law has many different practice areas, and a lawyer in each area performs different tasks on a day-to-day basis. You might think that litigators are in court arguing, corporate attorneys are negotiating deals and entertaining clients, and real estate lawyers are negotiating deals and assessing projects, but you’d be wrong. Most of them are buried in papers, reading boring documents, and researching boring law.

You may not find a job at all.

Even if you concede that your job won’t be meaningful or lucrative, you still may not find a job at all. The world already has too many lawyers. Not every person with a law degree is able to find a job as a lawyer.

Being a lawyer probably won’t be as meaningful or lucrative as you hope.

You may think that as a lawyer you can do meaningful, important work. You may think that as a lawyer, you can make a lot of money. You might be right, but you are probably wrong. Meaningful jobs are very difficult to get, and if you are able to get one, you will barely be able to afford to live. In addition, lucrative jobs are also difficult to get. Therefore, most lawyers have jobs that are not meaningful or lucrative, and very few have jobs that are both.

If you are able to find a job as a lawyer, you will have to work with other lawyers, who are often unpleasant people.

If anyone ever tells you that you should be a lawyer, be offended. Being told that you should be a lawyer is not a compliment, especially when being told by a parent. If you are a ten-year-old child, and your parent tells you that you should be a lawyer, your parent is telling you that you are argumentative, annoying, unpleasant, and excessively competitive, that you think you’re right all the time, and unable to admit when you’re wrong. If you become a lawyer, you will be surrounded by lawyerly people, you won’t like it, and you will inevitably become more lawyerly.

Defendants often just pay the plaintiffs’ lawyers’ extortion schemes. Doesn’t make you feel like you’re doing justice.

Defendants’ lawyers usually represent companies that ignore justice and pay the plaintiffs (and their lawyers) to go away instead of standing up for what is right. Usually, the company’s decision is the correct decision, because otherwise, the plaintiff’s lawyer will cost the company many times more money than the settlement would. So, bring a lawsuit, and earn some money. That’s the plan.

Lawyers are advocates. Advocates are annoying.

As a lawyer, your job will be to advocate for a position. No matter whether that position is right or wrong. No matter whether that position is reasonable or unreasonable. Being a lawyer is like being a lobbyist, both groups must represent the client who pays, not the client who is correct. Sacrificed on the altar of advocacy are truth, reason, and altruism.

Lawyers need everything done their way. For example, lawyers claim they are giving you “edits,” but they are actually giving you “my ways.”

If you become a lawyer, you will have to work with and for lawyers. Besides being advocates for their clients, lawyers are advocates for themselves. When you are working for them, they will advocate for their view of why they do things the “correct” way. Doing it their way will be the “correct” way, whether or not it is actually the correct way. Your way could be equally correct or even better than their way. So, though they may be telling you that they are giving you “edits” to your brief or your agreement, they are really giving you “my ways.”

Lawyers, like any business, must make money. For many lawyers, making money means making lawsuits.

Plaintiffs’ lawyers don’t make money without bringing lawsuits. (And, obviously, defendants’ lawyers need lawsuits also.) Therefore, plaintiffs’ lawyers must go out and find business, and create lawsuits to make a living. That means that the basis for the claim is less important, and the potential to make money from the claim is vital.

Plaintiffs very often have no legitimate claim.

Plaintiffs’ lawyers usually represent plaintiffs who are just looking to make money. Some plaintiffs have cases with factual support. Most do not. Most are either lying or had something bad happen to them, but that something bad does not give them the right to sue. People go to court these days to make money and make themselves feel better. The court is not for that.

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